For me it was very subtle over the years but always there (think like Chinese water torture). I visit my family for a week every year around Thanksgiving. My sister’s love it since it is Xmas early with Uncle Al.
I stated, you know I don’t mind seeing the kids, I do love them. I also love you two (my parents) and I want to see you first and not get inundated with the children.
My favorite statement when things get tight or whatever is ….. you don’t have kids you don’t understand.
I have a horse farm with >20 horses, 9 cats, and a dog …. I just don’t have the heart to say ….. um what do you think?