FWIW, welcome to the club … cookies are the to the left, coffee, tea and water to the right. :)

What I found helpful believe it or not was researching about transgenderism. What it did was help me re-align my feelings about my gender (I am a CIS male) because I asked those same questions. Am I really a male, because my upbringing and society tells me I am not doing “man” right.

Without going to deep into TMI, my therapist stated I should take the time when “taking care of my self” to look at varying pornography and sexualities to see if anything clicked and to report back. We talked about sexuality and gender and how it differs from person to person.

It helped me out as I truly love women, but what I realized was I love the fierce and independent and strong feminine spirit, but was not limited to all CIS female biological markers.

It was a lot to process and took several years to work through, but by attacking those demons of doubt and fear, it made me realize you can’t fight if you are in flight, which means drink and drugs and running away prevents you from dealing with it.

When I was done on my path, I realized that some of the strong fighters that were women, were just as toxic as some of the men, Feminism was not a bad thing but a good one. Sexuality as long as consent and love and connection was there between two or more people is all that matter.

But you can’t do this work running. If running helps, do the run, then when done and under the cool or hot stream of the shower. Think about what troubles you and don’t run from it. IF it hurts that is ok, take the time to do something pleasurable to help eleviate the pain ,but only after you processed it.

Take care. The road is not easy, but I believe you can make it. Remember the most beautiful humans are unique with edges, scars and rough spots on them. Gender is a construct in a way, with some biological markers to help us along the way.

You are amazing with ever klik you run, to every minute you shave …. be well!

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Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.

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Alan Tegel

Alan Tegel

Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.

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