Great perspective. That is the dirty secret to traditional hierarchal (patriarchy) societies. Men should continue to the adulting aspects in the relationship and the work should be balanced in managing the household and relationship aspects.

If it is when divorce happens, both should feel relief and happiness and sadness for choosing poorly. However, with failures comes later and greater success.

The thing is in that traditional setup, if the biological male does not do so of course it is a major benefit. One goes from work to no work.

One can track this event in American society by two things. Marriage Rates and Birth Rates. Women are opting out and who would blame them.

The only long term issue for this though is that it means in 4-5 generations time the society will die off. It is all part of a biological system, and in reality it should.

People may go wow no biggie, but the reality is the process started with Gen X and we are on Gen Z. That means the social systems built up on patriarchal configurations where birth rates were 3:1 or higher and stable populations, will start falling apart "now".

My point example is how bad off America's Social Security System is. One of the core components they have presumed was a replacement birth rate of 2.1:1. That has only happened twice since Roe v. Wade.

So the Boomers are going to get a surprise both on a medical angle and retirement as now mother nature and society will be required to shed them.

So what does society do? They attempt to shame women. Wrong answer. They should shame men? Wrong answer too.

They need to realize how we have raised boys has failed from Boomer to Gen Z. So society needs to learn to figure out some way to crash course "biological males" into becoming better in a way that empowers their masculinity and themselves. If this is done, then there will be two sets of gendered hands (presuming a binary view) to help lift up everyone out of this mess.

Until that is done, then smart women would be to opt out of this arrangement, and only engage as long as the biological male is a real authentic "man".

Which means working for his partner, the relationship, and other people around him to make their relationship and society better.

Then they can be acknowledged as "men".

My advice from the male POV, don't call a biological male a "man" or men if they aren't.

Call them boys, biological males, or faux-men.

That is my 2 cents from the cheap seats of society.

Great article

Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.