Hugs for you as I know I and others only wish you happiness and safety on your journey.
I believe you and many others including myself, have noticed from 2020-2021 the complete emptiness and void in a hyper majority of people that are around us.
For better or worse at some level [my belief] (especially in heteronormative) everyone in the back of their mind looks at a person they interact with at some point in the arc of friendship or wistful day dreaming and says ... hmmm I wonder how person X would be.
There is nothing wrong with it.
Why the point? Because with everyone being so vapid, there is no sacred "dick" or "vagina" in quite a few people in our modern society.
Point example. A leading horse person who burns through money like you wouldn't believe was babysitting her daughter's child (there is a dynamic of messed up in this family words can't describe so I will keep it simple). As such she had to leave the farm and her 90+ year old mother who just finished getting over COVID. My wife gets a frantic call, a foal tore most of it's face off. No joke, bone of the head could be seen and we are talking 6-8 inches of flapped skin. She can't get to it.
So picture in a dirty environment with a "spirited" [in the negative way] mare, 1/2 your face getting ripped off. My wife tells me she is going to get the foal and get it to the vet for an emergency surgery.
We do this as anything with horses requires two people. We get it there, and then have to wait nearly 90 minutes.
Why? A family (mother facetiming in), 13 year old daughter and man literally were debating with the doctor to do surgery for collic. Collic is when the horses intestines are twisted to the point they are blocked, and nothing else can pass. It is extremely painful to the horse. Some folks will say save the horse! Sure, but let me add color to this. 28 years old, and the horse had bald spots from where it rubbed itself in pain, and this was the 2nd doctor they visited (the other refused to do surgery as it wouldn't survive). The horse's maintenance was so bad it had dreadlocks in the mane ... this is not a family that tends to animals.
90 minutes so they could all say good bye while the horse thrashed in the stall. Humans with neglect and spades and the desire to feel good about themselves at the plight of their animal.
Meanwhile the hanging flap of skin was slowly dying on the foals face, which we rushed hard and fast to try to save.
The humans in this mix ... which are sacred and which are not .... You personally fit in the sacred arena as many other men and women I communicate with and have had friendships with.
So ... go find that sacred woman and man juice :) and enjoy!