Alan Tegel
2 min readAug 15, 2020

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I agree 100%, this is something women should practice every day (self-love). As for men, it should be practiced in moderation. The reason why is unless the man is totally in touch with his emotions and feelings, he needs to learn to use it effectively

So I chuckle and have an adage, "women should use more porn and less romance novels" and "men should use less porn and read more romance novels"

Do note, I am not saying to ban porn, or not watch it. Absolutely not, but it should be used in moderation because it is a very effective drug, and with drugs there does come a toxicity.

My first orgasm was at the hands of a female babysitter at 8. She then used pain to tell me it was bad but then told me "you are a man you must orgasm". Fast forward to college, being passed out on a couch from weed, booze and a party, coming to a guy fucking me. I am not a small man (was extremely built etc).

So as I shared in another comment with you, a had an issue (my share last year - tegelad search in medium for the metoo) ... she called me gay and questioned my manhood and maleness. It was the fucked up trifecta, but it was the 90's and well hell. Good luck Bro

I fixed me, but to survive, lots of sex, booze, and crazy shit. At some point though, a demisexual flag clicked and I love women and I can't use them as an object. So what is a guy to do with a high libido.

Porn and masturbation happened and it happened a lot. Before you ask ... yes I am in a relationship and have been so for nearly 25 years. So I am not some drooling guy in a basement. If you see me, I am extroverted and lively, and I have "lived" a lot. E.g. I am a million-miler flyer on American Airlines.

I have a lot of history and stories and experiences that would make people go wow.

That being said .... it was a drug and helped me not end myself. A new friend who is a psychologist who heard of my story and I shared was surprised I turned out as well as I did. I am apparantly rare.

Why? I self loved hard. Now, I am turning that off and trying to focus on living and loving.

You know what is funny? All that sexual energy is bouncing in me like I was a teenage boy at the mid-point of my life.

But for women ... you need touch and love, and you should love yourself, because society is evil, vile and wrong.

There is no shame, and if I see someone shaming a woman, you will see me "be the strongest" feminist ever..

Be well and hey ... go jill off :)

Great article

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Alan Tegel
Alan Tegel

Written by Alan Tegel

Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.

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