I agree with you on this. Being able to truly love and give another person "everything" they want and watching them enter into and out of subspace is amazing.
To control consensually another human being is an amazing experience.
For those that say I don't get it, imagine being a good friend to another person you are "really" attracted to. Imagine sharing sloppy bar kisses that don't go anywhere, but the lingering "feel" of a wonderful future is there.
Picture watching them go home with another person and finding out that they banged the night away.
How does that drop feel?
Some people are able to process it well (cuckqueen/cuckold) and turn it around and enhance the angst and feel.
Most can't. It is exhausting, because you literally poured energy into something or someone, and now you get to watch them walk away.