I am sorry you are in a low libido vs high libido intimacy relationship. It happens, but I am super happy you two have found a balance. Some folks put more weight into sex and others don’t and gender doesn’t always apply.
So in a way you answered the question IMO, your intimacy your life and that is ok.
Also do listen, his self confidence which was low prior to the accident, probably went empty after. Maybe he has fetishes or fantasies (since you caught him masturbating) that you can explore.
Guys given society (patriarchy as defined by feminism) can have a really hard time trusting with their hearts and the second brain when it fails.
I learned the hard way in college when I had an ED issue due to coming out of being raped by another guy, and lets say my girlfriend (ex after it) treated me poorly because she labeled my failure as being homosexual (I am a CIS male). Why that is pertinent is life took from him.
I do hope you can continue fully on your journey and keep the love of your life and of course don’t feel bad or sad about your journey. You have given him loyalty and support in his weakest moment, and that is priceless. I do hope he embraces everything you have to offer and feels whole and complete.