I believe it is due to jealousy and a power imbalance in the relationship. Of course there is a maturity aspect/angle to it.
I love seeing more and more women have the liberation they desire and deserve. I hope women as the norm are fully formed and free.
That being said, men and boys are still shackled to the same bounds in society (defined in feminism as Patriarchy) that existed at the start of woman’s suffrage. I believe women know this and get this, but still find it hard to believe this is the case.
Take Denmark …. where there is more equality. I saw a writer that stated it was thankful to strong masculine female feminists that “pre-broke” masculinity in Dutch men.
Think about this, what does this say for men and the messaging that is pushed forth that boys and men are broken. (I won’t go further as that dives into a whole another set of topics and discussion, but just be mindful of this).
So take your lover, partner, etc at the time … you want to share an expression of love and joy you had, and want to share your experience with him. He sees it as a threat of being cuckolded in the future -or- not being good enough (rise up the evil green monster or insecurity of abandonment).
For those with bias that jump into stereotypes of not pleasant variety, it is not being man enough (when women are communicating dude I trust you enough to share something with you). If we look at it as a bias, the man being insecure because for most to all of his life he has been abandoned because a lack of touch or connectedness in the soul to the mind to the spirit because “men are not supposed to be that way” [enter in stoicism in the postive side to toxic masculinity at the worst]
I have used this example before … as women become truly free in western society, they are Ph.ds in gender relationships while guys are fighting through middle school. The levels of communication and comprehension is not there.
So this response if we assume good intent and no threats is .. ouch you touched me in a sensitive spot as I am learning to trust and be there with you with my heart.
In bygone eras highly traditional and patriarchal, it was a woman’s purity that signed the last step of acceptance and full trust (i.e the act of penetration and intimacy). So if I pretend (ha no way possible) to be a woman … this is the end of a process where she trusts enough of the man (barring no lust/crazy transactional sex moment) to move forward in a set of committment into the relationship … for men it is the start of a conversation.
This is where men are broken and need effective ways of talking and growing, and maybe with COVID-19 … texting, talking, sexting, and distant communication is the start of something better for both genders ….
Dunno … but I do hear your desire (as most women probably feel the same) … it is about wanting a partner that is ride or die to share stories and grow together and share happy moments as a base, so more happy memories can be made.
But on the flip side … the devil is in the details. Would you desire him more if he talked to female partners that gave better oral, were better in bed, or were more crazy in the sex acts? Is this a piece of knowledge something that a woman would desire or be ok with? Especially, if that woman maybe in the same geographic area as she is?
To each there own … thank you for a wonderful article ..