I believe part of the issue is men don't trust men, and as such can only attempt to connect to their manhood via women.

This leads to a very awkward position for women who don't want to do the emotional labor that becomes obvious.

I have no doubt that this is an issue, and it needs to be addressed. Being disconnected whether it be sexual, mental, or physical plays the worlds most awful thing on you.

I don't have the answers. What I do promise is an ear to guys that desire an ability to talk openly about things, but that being said ... it is hard to do so online and disconnected.

I don't know if it is a worse hell for women, men being stuck in a patriarchal void or on the cusp of one. I can imagine it can be uber frustrating to desire some positive mindful male companionship (starting in a friend mode obviously) and to look around and say ... nope .. not it ... not it ... fuck it.

What I try to do (I don't know how successful I am) is try to be as open and honest as I can) and when I feel that my internal feelings are coming out strong. I try my best to focus on something else work, walking, my partner (if and when she is emotionally and physically available), and if not ... go release the demons with self pleasure. I know the latter is probably disgusting to some, but honestly my soul is in need of touch and reaffirmation I better go self love myself then force it on another person.

If I feel I have gotten close or approached a bombing view on a social media platform, I try to reach out and check boundaries. I don't know if that is the right way or acceptable way, but it is the way I am trying to do this to ensure friendships are intact and everyone is kept safe and whole.

The real reality is though .. when it comes to most guys. They are too shallow and to into whatever fetish they are into (and fetish can be politics or games, or sports etc ....) and frankly they lack depth.

Women have this depth and hence I find myself more comfortable in those realms. That being said I can appreciate how just my presence may not be a good thing since women are bombarded with "crap" and crap men and society .... so I try to read the room and step away.

As I have watched your writing over time ... I have enjoyed your writing, and thank you for quantifying and using your anecdotal view to share what you are feeling unsafe with.

As a guy, just know I personally try to step up my game, and I hope one day I can help other guys do the same.

I hope this wasn't too long, but I felt you deserved a worthy response.

Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.