I made sure to read your article after I read it, and this I saw immediately. I made a comment that it needed scientific data and asked did they have a female editor review the data.

The other thing I observed was the "wants" was heavily used instead of "desired".

The reality most of the checklist item could be requested by either gender, so it was a um ok.

My view working through the shit fest, was I need emotional safety the most. I don't want a partner that makes my life "easier" per se, but I do want a partner that doesn't make it harder, especially without consent.

So if I use an adage a friend of mine in my past from deep Appalachia told me, when I was venting to her about an issue I had in my current relationship.

Does she not understand a goal for her is to make you hard, not make your life hard.

Now if we made that a checklist item, it is harsh, brash, and fits "some" moments in a guys life.

The more enlightened gets what I started with.

The view as you called out is very binary and simplistic looking. I had a few therapists that approached my issues like this article, and lets say they didn't last long.

I realize I have lots of baggage that I have had to sort and toss aside. That being said, I have layers in my masculinity threaded with femininity aspects, that if a person gets to really know me. ... will appreciate deeply.

For I am that stubborn guy that won't stop if a friend is in trouble, can love unconditionally, and deep wells of kindness and forgiveness threaded with stoicism.

That makes me in danger of dependency issues, but with a partner that knows the desires and not a checklist of wants ... infinitely better for partnership.