I wish him to work with a therapist alone and with Jada to work out his issues "in private".

That means a large scale timeout and stepping away for several years.

He has the resources and ability to do this, while most normal folks like us can't. We have to put on our big girl and boy pants and do life.

The thing honestly (like I think I shared) that bothered and stoked me over days was every action post "action", he showed his true intent.

Two non-apologies, then withdrawing from the Academy.

In a dream world can you imagine if he used words, and Chris Rock apologized? That would be a fight for masculinity, for folks with body issues that get picked on, for folks with health issues that are so personal and damaging.

He could have been a super hero to it all, he was that close, and given how he promotes himself over the decades, and what not throwing the first punch at the same time of words or before ...

If Ice Cube or any of the singers from the Super Bowl did it, folks might say well it fits their persona so game on.

Managing emotions is not easy even if you are a woman, but given our cultural patriarchal man-box reproving that happens every day non-stop, it is super hard as a man.

Will I not listen to his past music and movies? No I will enjoy them, but he should not be getting future movies and deals or anything until he truly works on himself and realizes the action he should have done 'after' the attack.

1. Leave after bringing violence into a show children could watch

2a. If not leave, accept the award, do your speech and move on -or-

2b. Apologize to the audience, Chris Rock, and most importantly Jada for his actions as they were no appropriate, then take the award and leave. Do not go to after parties. Go home and process the event with the family and yourself.

3. He broke code of conduct standards. Withdraw from the academy, state his actions were wrong, and ask after he does the therapy and work to request to be able to be brought in.

4. Then support Jada as she speaks to the harm that was done to her. It is her story and words to respond, not his.

What truly makes me sad, is the fact women believe this is how men should act to protect them.

Brand Masculinity needs a makeover in the worst possible way. Here we sit in 2022 showing the world America is still the same as it was in 1922.

I am no therapist like yourself, but I see a "fuck-ton" of "oh hell no red flags" all over his internal mind and relationship, that if they aren't in therapy ... this won't end well.

There are things we could talk to about this issue, but frankly once the punch (er slap) was issued. The focus went all on will smith and his actions, instead of where it needed to be.

The use of a dark and edgy comic on a public venue with millions of people for ratings

I said this elsewhere, but the fact that I could actually use with good intent and non-trolling and state "don't womansplain masculinity to me" to some folks "including hard core feminist who mocked my correction of "toxic masculinity" in an appropriate public way ... Breathless.

But my positive take away, is I don't feel any discussion personally or threatened. I feel sadness for other and happiness I have the layers to know how to process this.

For someone like me ... It makes me proud of the work I did, but also sad women have to settle for 1/2 faux-men in their lives