If you have a whiteboard, put up a checklist of things to move to a new place, with a countdown of the days.

There are quite a few "unproductive" partners out there in the wild. I lost track of the number of guys who have complained about the women in their lives being slugs, lazy, and what not.

So the epidemic strikes across the gender pool of life, sadly, and you drew a short straw (so sorry to see that it has happened to you).

What I have noticed (even with women in your situation) and cross referencing it with the guys I know.

Productive people have a blind spot when it comes to cutting people slack for whom they love and trust. Unproductive people have a sense on how to pony up right next to that blind spot and do "just enough" to slide in.

They are super efficient because their only job is to get you hooked, and then well you know the rest. They want your emotional and distracted, because when it happens, it activates you "fix it" mode and then frustration happens and the days click on by.

My two cents advice (I know ... a white guy sharing his view watch out world!) is that you try not to send out the vibes of prejudging all men by individuals even within the circle. It sets up a karmic feedback of negativity, which will push away future partners who you may want to hook up and partner with.

When one does that, sadly, the writer gets labeled by guys (not my view) and they just activate their "indifference" mode and walk away.

Now ... if he does have redeeming qualities. Don't treat him like a child. Treat him like a coworker on a shared project. He passes or fails. If he isn't working, then set up a list and say congratulations, since you are not stressed. I need a daily massage. I need physical intimacy (your way and of course your needs are taken first), his needs ... not so much. Tell him you expect it every day, or else there is no point for him.

My view as a guy. He is a house "husband". His job is to do "all the house work". If he fails to do it, then point to the white board and say. Failure to comply means in those many days, we are divorced.

There are guys out there unlike him. They are busy with full lives and work. Some have been picked up, some are free agents.

The big thing you need to be prepared for is if you do find a "real adult" man (not like what you have). There will be a serious of other issues to deal with. E.g. Not having time for one another as both are busy adulting.

Good luck on your travels, and if you desire to write another article (post breakup, since we all know he will probably not achieve what you both need). You may want to try another stab on the process of getting rid of a non-productive partner ...

Be well.

Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.

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