It is ok to believe in this as it limits the risk of rejection and pain due to the failure of humanity. However, with limited risk there is limited reward. It highlights a deep realism sugar coated with sadness. Relationships go through phases, the drug induced high where in heterosexual coupling roles are reversed (this lasts 1–3 years), then the swap back and re-finding of one another and another dating phase of 1–3 years …. then the reckoning where people learn to decide whether or not they can deal with each other for life … 1–3 years …

To reach the 3–9 year phased view (where years are time together sans kids and other commitments) one sees all the ranges of the person and then they decide whether they are the one “truly”. If after 9 years of relationships you still actively want to have sex and be engaged through the thick and thin of real life, and still deal with each other amicably (whether married, living together), one has to have love, physical attraction, communication abilities and relationship incites. People mistake common political interests or what we do for a living as what is important (it isn’t).

The one embodies the three items above and shows it through intimacy which should include sex (doesn’t have to if one embraces alternative methods like karezza). The people that get high marks (0–10) in all three and check off the sexual part …. are usually soulmates. Also, they don’t say or reflect upon it as they know as words don’t describe it.

But if you mean you don’t believe in soul mates without the work involved in making a relationship …. you are 100% correct in your view. If that isn’t the case, then one has to ask what is the point of life? That doesn’t have to be negatively viewed either …

Lover of people, Texas Feminist Liberal Democrat, Horse Farm, High Tech Gadget ENFP Guy, and someone who appreciates the struggle of women and wants to help.

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