Money, Sex, and politics ... the perfect conversations for over the holidays right!!! (ha)

Yeah, for me, the question comes down to this. If I have to be the executor, then sure. I need to know. As for my parents wealth, am I entitled to it? No.

Would I love to have it? Yes but never at the expense of their time on this earth or any social concerns.

Do I have white male privilege and am I lucky with what I do and how I have lived?

Absolutely.

If I was in your shoes and had the shitstorm of your life you are justified for asking. But also beware of the consequences, which you have already covered elegantly through out. I won't belabor that point "at all". You did you and you did the best you could and you executed it to your way.

For the MIL, if she doesn't have sympathy and empathy in her soul ... I feel sorry for your father. He has to sleep next to her.

As for wealth, my parents were adamant that they have two houses one for me and one for my sister. Since I am more the black sheep of the family (ha sound familiar), my sister will get the more amazing lake house and I get the suburb house. They know I will see it as for living in the Midwest versus Texas?

If I had to move I would move to LA ... or someplace else (or stay in Texas). That is me.

As for you ... you did the best you could ... that is all you can ask for and you have my respect (if it matters at all) ...