Most men in modern USA culture, always feel invisible. I have a belief the rates of infidelity with guys in committed relationships are due to the fact they don't know how to deal with receiving desire.

The only metric guys have to think about is based upon the wallet size, or if they are an athlete/singer/etc (i.e. rare gem view).

I think this is where this article and another one you had written about breadwinner women come from.

The thing is there are huge chunks of the population of women that get this though (the invisibility) and when women age due to patriarchal constructs (taste it later in life).

I "believe" some of the frustration and ugh women feel come from having the education and experience where men literally don't. Then given we are adults, folks are judged, and being found lacking the impact of trauma of the past falls into hard core judgement.

So that means that adult males that have only constructs of traditionality to fall back on, whiplash like you state here (and in your breadwinner article).

Women then say WTF then rebel because they attempt to say we are lifting the burden of provider status, so we can be partners this is a good thing.

But on the flip side (using the adage of women fear men will kill them, men fear that women will laugh at them), it comes across "bad" in a womansplaing masculinity to a man.

You have done a very good job explaining why when a woman says "I don't know a man", two men may get the trigger response. One will go off as a traditional adult male, which is what the women are referring too.

While the other will know that she doesn't want a traditional adult male, but a man partner.

The thing is though and the hard part which men are experienced at too (or human beings who aren't societal "pretty" or have sexuality and gender positions outside the norm), will learn that with the ability to be independent and free also means the ability to have dark periods of loneliness (versus ok solitude) since the pool of humanity is smaller on the acutalized human beings.

The really odd thing is I have a sneaking suspicion that the rule will be "I am a man with an empathic and vulnerable heart" ... I make the rules (versus the patriarchal trope of I have the pussy ...