So agree with this, "inside out" and I look at the person's gender balance and look for complimentary needs.
Then the preferences (body) come out. If you are a muscle bound woman very alpha feminine, turn on. If you are a femme man in transition with the right feminine curves (and strong feminine spirit (hello there).
You are traditional rubensque woman with real curves that too.
You more andro like, but have that look (that means minimal chest and the right spirit (boom).
The common thread is ... what is the hell on the inside.
I have a lot of angles and dimensions with lots of missing puzzle pieces in my soul, so intent, heart, "soul" means everything.
You hit the nail on the head. Hot and sexy at a bar or some meeting place, I can't have a conversation with you. No way are we going near the bedroom. To use an analogy I used on one of Yael's articles
If two people (me there) are thirsty and sex is a pool, then I am a person who we will make sure we can talk about building an infinity pool.