Then this is a signal that this not a compatible relationship and IMO a final talk (and maybe sex if you feel it warrants it) is needed with closure.
Since you don't know and are assuming a lot there is a lot of communication not happening.
He is not built for free form fucking, he is either battling from the loss of a relationship, has too much stress with a job and his kids, or you two are just not sexually compatible. It happens.
As for you, if that is all you desire, then realize you just need to stick to pure transactional sex and that is ok too. Just realize you may need to open the pool as the pool of guys as they age have sexual issues and needs that most women will only know when trust and communication happens.
This is a guys issue as before one dives into sex one needs to talk if they aren't ready. As for women like yourself that say WTF, this is a masculinity issue. As a a man has no place with sexual and physical issues with a woman, the same applies in return. This is an experience for women to feel where men when younger have felt when they have been rejected and have had not so good sexual experiences. It sucks, and I wish it didn't happen but it did.
If we take a hypothetical, you and I meet up somewhere, I will know your birthday, and more about you before we even go there. We talk about sexual hangups and redlines, and what we like. We take our time and we connect. We do not bang on the first date. My days of being young, dumb, and full of cum is a long way in the past. If that is what you want, guess what if you are interested in the future and I feel ready for a one-night booty call, game on. If not happy trails and good luck.
As for him, since it is obvious you should end this, and if you desire to take the high road. Tell him that you are in this for the sex and while he seems like a good guy he needs to work things out. State you need to figure out if you can do sex without connection and emotions, if condoms are an issue, learn to masturbate with condoms so you can deal with the reduced sensation and feels guys feel with not having bareback sex (yes it is real and yes it can be a huge difference in how good the sex is).
