Vanessa Torre Emotional Bankruptcy it is. It disturbs me at so many levels as a human being and as a man. I don’t see it as a high minded high road thing, I see it as a bar for humanity.
Personal Example: In a hotel on the road, I am at this hotel “a lot”. The staff knows me, the manager, the bartenders “everyone” knows me. I am a fun and decent person, who doesn’t sleep well and well drank a lot of coffee and chit-chatted with the staff at night.
Bad winter storm, cabs are down and it is a hot mess on a blizzard night. A woman comes down paces in and out then is crouched down outside. I am an ex-smoker (5 years now), so something feels “off”. I go outside for a smoke to offer her one and she is sad. I say what is up. My pimp won’t pick me up and I can’t get a cab and I don’t want to be arrested. The guy kicked me out also.
I tell her to come in and she states she has been warned. Come in trust me, she sighs and says ok. I tell the night manager I need more coffee. He goes back and makes a fresh pot and me and her drink. He raises his eyes and shakes his head and I wave him away. i.e. my privilege they won’t fuck with me (to give you a reference to the head of the Marriott met me and said you are my #5 spend for the state.
We finish the coffee off and I said listen I am sober enough now (stopped drinking at 11 pm it is 4 am. Let me drive you to your place. She says ok. The night gets worse and worse but I get her to her place.
I help her up (did I tell you her heels where high) and got her into the apartment and we were cold AF (no heat since the car didn’t fully warm-up). Come on up let me make you a cup of coffee and we can have a smoke.
We talked and waited for it to stop snowing and she said you are nice how about a freebie. I am like no thanks. This is what humans do for one another, and your company was good enough.
This is what this whole sad show does to women and to high powered men with money. It dehumanizes it. It is fucked up. I can’t empower it nor will I, but it makes it hard because it is not my body or choice. But if I am in a position where I can help, I try to do so in the most human way possible.
Thank you for taking the time to read it.
It is a topic that irks me, and frankly the more I fix me the more angry it makes me because of the raw damage it does to people.