Very much agree with you on this.
Most people seem to forget that quickie sex or as it is shown or portrayed in modern media has a very high tendency to be highly unfulfilling to one or both partners "and" a majority of the time is similar to mutual masturbation.
You get off, I get off ... ok what was your name again?
So my advice to a couple starting out where one or both are virgins.
That is a-ok. You are unique and special as you are taking the time necessary to get to know someone.
If transactional sex is 1x, connected sex is 1000x transactional sex, committed and Love sex is 1000x connected sex.
As I shared, I figured this out in my sordid travels after having a fun three-some with two women, both whom were fantastic looking.
Does that mean only the beautiful can have fantastic sex? Hell no.
My best sex was with what my buddies called a "granola" girl. Other great ones were that average girl with average curves, but a knockout mind and personality.
You can have fantastic orgasms solo running in parallel or help each other out and be far ahead of some married people who got married or live together, or just are FWB.
Connection matters. It is everything.