You sound like an amazing man with empathy in spades. Moving to the Texas area and seeing and meeting the people of Oklahoma (I am a Texoman now). I can definitely see the horror show of bias you have to live in..
If I try to think about your position, it is having to puff up my chest (I am a bigger guy) to hide my more sensitive side because I don’t want to be taken advantage of “or” to make myself seem weak so my partner isn’t at risk.
So I hope you wear clothes, dress how you feel like, live in your gendered spirit and feel fully empowered as a man.
Be well.